When we speak we hardly think about the impact of our words but believe us when we tell you words do have an impact and that too a deep impact. While there are proverbs that quote that sticks and stones may break my bones, but words cannot hurt me, this is not entirely true. In fact, words and the way they affect your mind are something that we all ought to be mindful of. What if we told you that there are some words that you need to stay away from if you want to get ahead in life? It is true and we will give you some examples to put across our point.
Ramon was a young man who had met the girl of his dreams though she was not from the same village as he was, which was a big bone of contention with his parents, especially his mother. But love will persist and they were happy to be with each other. He proposed, she accepted and they got married. It was a happy marriage with much love and happiness. However, one day they had a major fight (as all couples do) and Ramon stormed away from home. Feeling really worked up, he walked up to his mother’s place instead of his own house. His mother after offering him something to drink and some refreshments, asked him what the matter was. Ramon found himself telling his mother about the fight. After listening to the whole thing his mother said “I knew this would happen. If only you had listened to me and married a girl from our village”. This was something she would often say but that day her words stuck Ramon with renewed force.
Though he and his wife resolved their fight, he would often wonder if things would have been different if he had married someone from his village. It would make him wonder when he had to eat unfamiliar food or if they had an argument about celebrations and so on. Ramon’s mother never realized that with the use of the words “if only” she had sown deep the seeds of doubt within his mind and they were rapidly taking root. Soon there were more fights between Ramon and his wife and things started to go bad for them. However, Ramon’s father was a wise man who had started liking his daughter-in-law for the loving woman she was and the wife she was to Ramon. One day he sat Ramon down and told him that he was not doing the right thing by analyzing everything his wife did and that he should not have any regrets in mind when it comes to his decision to marry Rosie (Ramon’s wife).
Then he told him that life is based on trust and faith and this process starts with the self. He said that while it is okay to have a lot of doubts before making a decision, it is not right to keep second guessing what things could have been like after making the decision.
As Ramon listened his father, he was angry with him for interfering but once he had cooled down, he realized that he was right and Ramon had fallen into the trap of “if only” and started to become bitter. That day he sat down with Rosie and held her hand while apologizing to her about the way he had been behaving. As he told her about what happened, they realized that certain words and terms used at the wrong time can wreak havoc on their lives. They decided to make a list of them so that they would be cautious in the use of these words in the future.
They realized that while mere words do not have the power to make you feel good or bad but the timing does matter. We need to use words with care especially when we are full of anger. However, coming to the above words, the reason these words have a lot of power over us is because they create that element of doubt in our mind. In many instances, the same words may not have much impact, but in a weaker moment, these words can come back to haunt us.
One of the simple easy ways to deal with stress, is to ensure that we keep ourselves open to good experiences and positive people but slow down our reaction when around negative people combined with a bad experience. In the same way, one should think things through when you are talking to someone who is going through a tough experience so that you do not consciously or unconsciously program their mind to become negative.