Life can be tough on you and one of the things that can make you feel better about undertaking this journey we call life, is having a partner that you can love and trust. However, while there is a chance that you might find love if you open yourself up to it and work hard at it, trust is another issue. In fact, you will be hard pressed to find love without trust. Then, why do we find it so hard to trust others? It is because we have learned through so many harsh lessons that we have been dealt with, that trusting someone can lead to a lot of pain even when there is a trace of betrayal.
We can go on for hours about love and trust and still not come to any useful conclusions. Keeping this in mind, we present to you this story that will tell you about how much betrayal can hurt and how to go about fixing trust issues in a relationship.
Mary Kate and Paul had been dating for seven years and their relationship had been the subject of envy among their friends circle. However, Mary Kate had learned something that had made them doubt their whole relationship. She had recently learned that Paul had made derogatory remarks about her being just a one-night stand when they had started dating to all his friends. She was hurt to hear this because she had been in love with him even before she had started dating him.
Once she realized the way Paul had felt at the beginning of their relationship, she started to look at everything he said and did with a lot of suspicion. She would wonder if he was preparing to leave her any time soon or if he was finding himself attracted to someone else. She would spend hours wondering about any small change in him; real or perceived. The whole thing had become such an obsession with her that she started becoming absentminded at work and distracted at home.
Paul noticed the changes in her but kept quiet hoping that she would talk to him about it as he knew that she was upset about him not proposing to her. He planned to when the time was right because for him what started as a one-night stand had turned into the best thing in his life. However, after a couple of weeks he started to get really worried about Mary Kate as she seemed to be more withdrawn and upset than before.
He discussed things with his friends and discovered that one of them had jokingly told Mary Kate about her starting as one-night stand to him. The more he thought about it, the more Paul started to realize that Mary Kate had started to change from the time she must have heard this. Paul decided the best thing to do was talk things over with Mary Kate. That night, he surprised Mary Kate with her favorite dinner dishes and asked her to spare him half an hour to talk things over.
He sat Mary Kate and told her that yes, he had gone on a date with her with the intention of the relationship being a short-term one, but he had started to fall in love with her after that. He told her how rich and fulfilling she made his life and how he not only loved her but he also liked her company, her quirks, her nature, and her sense of humor. He then went on to tell her that he would like to marry her if she was willing to accept his proposal.
Mary Kate just sat there with tears in her eyes and realized where things had gone wrong and realized why honesty is the best policy.
Here Are Some Of The Things That She Realized, About How To Fix Trust Issues In A Relationship:
Trust is a two-way street: One of the first things that Mary Kate realized that it is better to trust someone if you wanted them to trust you. You may not always get the kind of trust and reliability but that does not matter as long as you keep trying. In spite of the hurt of betrayal, it is better to keep trusting as without trust, life can become meaningless.
Honest communication is good: In order to keep the trust going, it is very important to keep honest communication going at all times. It may not be a formal conversation but people need to talk.
It is better to deal things with each other: One of the most important things about keeping trust going in a relationship is to ensure that you do not let a third party in it and deal with each other directly.
Never presume things: One of the main things about trust in a relationship is to ensure that you do not assume things blindly.
Expect life to have problems: Life has problems, this could also mean betrayal of trust, and while this is tough to deal with, you will need to accept that it is a part of life.